85 Days Til What???

Well, what can I say?  We've had a very busy summer at SOTH.  It's almost Labor Day already and that gets me thinking about how close the holiday season is.  You saw it in the title here.  It is only 85 days until Thanksgiving here in the USA.  While everyone gears up for the change of seasons, we are gearing up at SOTH for the holidays.  It's not parties we are thinking about either.
 I would love to believe we may be able to prevent some people from getting all excited about meeting their new romantic interests for the holidays only to be left waiting alone at the airport for someone who is never going to arrive as they promised.  To me, this seems like one of the worst parts of these scams.  All that happy anticipation boiling down to deep disappointment in just a few minutes just makes me almost want to go set up a booth or room at the nearest airport just to be there for anyone who was waiting on a phantom that did not show up.  But the best I can do is prepare myself for the holidays at SOTH.  The busiest time of the year always seems to be that time between Thanksgiving and Valentine's Day and sometimes on through to Easter as these fakes pretend they are going to be "home" for the holiday.

Consider this my little booth at the airport as I hope to send out the message to anyone who may be reading this right now...if you are using online dating sites to find love, please be very careful and please read everything you can find online about romance scams so that you can also be prepared for the holidays.  If you are emailing someone, check the FULL email header (not the abbreviated one we all see on our emails) to find the IP address of the person you are emailing.  Don't be concerned about invasion of privacy.  It's out there for anyone to see and to be safe in this world, it's something we need to learn how to do to protect ourselves.  If you have received photos, run them through Tineye and Google Images to see if those photos have been stolen or used on other profiles in the past.  If these come up without any convincing information as to whether the person you are talking to is a scammer, then contact us so we can help you figure it out.  It's so much better to be safe and know than to risk your heart being broken and your bank account cleaned out.  And it's much better than waiting at the airport to find out the truth.

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Okay a quick change in topic to announce that we have added a new moderator to our group.  We now have four moderators who are ready, willing, and able to help you navigate your way through the internet jungle.  We'd love to tell you all that it's a safe place out there.  But we can't do that.  What we can do is help you learn how to be safer online, especially when online dating or using social networks such as Facebook.  So help me welcome our new moderator, Angel, to the fold.  Along with Mair, Share, and myself, Angel will be there for you to reach out to if you need help dealing with romance scam issues.

cp     

Thanksgiving Romance Scams

Thanksgiving is a special time for getting together with family and friends. Unfortunately, romance scammers know this and they use it to try to move closer to our hearts.  Promises of travels to meet for Thanksgiving abound and victims go to the airports and sit and wait...and wait...and wait...until they realize nobody is going to show up.  

Then the inevitable email shows up, or the text, or phone call.  There was a delay.  There was an accident. There was a customs issue.  Whatever the problem was, they need money...your money.  And only you can help them.  They will come up with all types of scenarios that left them stuck at the airport on their end, or in the hospital, or even in jail as some have claimed, and the only way they can get home to you is if you send them money.  They might even have you talk to someone else on their behalf.  It might be a customs official, a policeman, or doctor, or nurse.  It might be a lawyer.  It could be anyone they think you would believe to help make their story more plausible.  But no matter who they say they are, they are not real.  They are part of the ongoing scam and their ultimate goal is to get more money out of you.

You are there at the airport...or maybe by now you have gone back home, disappointed and heartbroken that your love is not going to be there with you for Thanksgiving as promised.  What do you do now? "Could everyone have been right?  Is this only a scam and not real at all?  How am I going to explain this to the rest of my family who is expecting to meet him/her? They tried to warn me that it was not real in the first place.  I was going to prove it to them.  I was going to get to introduce him/her to the family in person and they would know he/she was real.  Now I can't do that.  Now he/she isn't coming after all.  Maybe they were right and it was all fake.  What now?"  All these thoughts race through your mind combined with worries about the love of your dreams.  "Could they really be real and be in trouble like they claim to be?  What if they are real and need help?  What if I am right and everyone else is wrong?  What if he/she IS REAL?"

We are so sorry if this is happening to you right now.  Many of our members have been through exactly this kind of situation.  The emotions fill you with confusion and fear along with embarrassment that you have gotten in so deep into a possible romance scam.  You don't know which way to turn except that you have to decide if you are going to believe this person one more time and take a chance on sending more money.  How do you find out if he/she is real or a scammer?  Is there really any way to know the truth?

We can help you figure it out at Scams of the Heart 

We have the tools to find out the truth.  We will also teach you these tools so you can be safe online.  We also have experienced all these same emotions and situations caused by romance scams.  We will share our stories with you and help you deal with whatever is going on in your situation.  The truth is, real people do not ask for money from people they only know online.  They do have other options to get help if they need help other than to ask someone they have only spoken to online and/or by telephone.  Romance scammers play on our hopes and dreams and emotions to get money from us.  They often take even more from us than money. 

We hope you are not waiting for anyone at the airport this Thanksgiving holiday week.  But if you are, and they don't show up because of some scenario like the ones mentioned above, come check us out.  We can help you get through this.

cp